It started out getting a x Ray and blood work for surgery on my spinal stenosis c5 c6 c7, as well as a flu shot. Everything was perfect a couple days later while driving I did a shoulder check and felt a swelling in my neck, being a hypochondriac that day and thinking I was having3 a reaction to the flu shot I went to the doctors the following day!
Antibiotic's for a week had no change, she (not my regular doc) asked if I would go for a ultra sound, I said yes and instead of going back to work I went home, a 25 minute drive. After being there 30 minutes the phone rang, the hospital had a opening in 45 minutes. I thought wow that was quick, accepted the appointment which was a 45 minute drive and promptly left the cabin.
I got to watch the ultrasound on a big screen, saw the two black anomalies, asked the tech about the process and was shown a few cool things about ultrasounds how they could color the blood through flow through arteries,red one way blue the other, passing right against the black anomalies. I knew the black spots were not good.
I returned home and had a call from the doctors office by the end of the day to return the next to discuss the results, my family doctor Dr. Dabeers took over at this point, we had a good discussion about cancer and its possibilities as the swelling was lymph's and only on one side, how about a C.T. scan he asked?
My doctor and I have had about a 4 year relationship doctor patient of course, I was having problems with pain and numbing in my arms my girlfriend at the time insisted I do something and gave me a list of options, I did not have a family doc and it so happened he was starting out in new clinic close by.
I believe for a doctor to be a good doctor that I have to be a good patient and that means being honest, which included telling him about my addiction, the struggle was still active the first year or two I was his patient, my addiction is a whole different story which I'll get to on another page, right now its cancer, however recovery would help me greatly get through what the future held.
The C.T. scan happened within a couple days and the results were back at the doctors for the following Monday. He said I had him baffled he claimed he was expecting to see a brain or lung tumor. Very grateful I didn't know what to expect, obsessing about that on top of two anomalies would have just added to the stress. He suggested a M.R.I. and a visit to a surgeon to discuss a possible biopsy, and see if she had any ideas.
The MRI was very important, not for the exam as it showed nothing new but for a message I got from a elderly couple, it stuck with me and I listened "take someone with you for a second set of ears as you won't retain all the doctors say and will hear shit they didn't say. This was key and again brought alota laughs, I'll explain that part later. ALWAYS TAKE A SECOND SET OF EARS
I have always been told that if there's a problem they will call and I came to understand if it's trouble they'll call sooner than later, makes sense, and if your a good patient they are really quick, BE A GOOD PATIENT thorough and on the ball. Again my history including addiction and upcoming two year clean anniversary were discussed. Dr Vanderpoutin seemed more like a granola crunching hippie chick than a surgeon. I had alota faith she knew what she was doing all the same.
To this point lymphoma was the discussion, surgery came and went and the phone call for the results came back quickly, I had exclaimed I was still attending support group near daily and her reply was to stay focused on it as I would need to be strong and stay clean for what was about to come. I was diagnosed with Squamous P16 cancer a skin cancer that was on the rise in my age group with a tag from the H.P.V. virus.
The H.P.V. virus I was to learn and laugh about many time afterward came and went unknowingly, I guess one of my dirty girl flings from my past was a lil dirtier than I knew Anyway it's very common a known cause of cervical cancer in females(a silent killer of women) My body fought the virus so i never knew, I would meet quite a few people going through the exact same during the next few months but not right away.
The next appointment was a couple weeks later with Dr Sally Smith my radiation oncologist, Dr Smith was a rather attractive woman who seemed more like a corporate business women than a Dr again faith came into play but the shock I got when she said "this is very serious Mr Goodwin you have stage 4 throat cancer". She exclaimed that head and throat cancer was staged differently than body cancer with a. and b. treatable and c. we send you to tend to your affairs. Now upto this point I had thought it was caught early as I had absolutely no symptoms except the swollen lymph's the problem was they did not know where the source was and a P.E.T. scan was ordered this roof a few weeks and required to travel to Vancouver on the mainland, my youngest child's Mom and my step daughter took me, the PET scan was a interesting experience, a mask made a couple weeks previously and a giant Velcro blanket held me firmly in place while the scanner looked for a injected radioactive substance that glucose carried to the cancer. This test would reveal a hot spot on my tonsils, again a common spot for the H.P.V. wart to find a home. This was followed up again by another surgeon Dr Adnams.
35 rounds of radiation and three rounds of chemotherapy were prescribed, the first round of chemo I had been put in a room with a fella that was going through his last treatment it turns out we had similar support groups and he was a comforting guide through the days treatment, by this time my taste buds and saliva glands were compromised fro. The radiation and I was about to become really sick from the chemo, I was losing weight and my ability to concentrate was gone. How ever dark this time had become I had been giving a couple books to read one called Anti Cancer, I highly suggest this book it lifted my spirits took me out of a dark place and inspired me. Round two of chemo was nasty and by the time round three was to be felt I was to sick, had lost too much weight I opted out.
The radiation treatments were simple but after the chemo I was getting rides to the treatments, I was very fortunate to have a few friends I could rely on for this which made my life easier and my teen son took 2 weeks of school to drive me as well, he had never driven in the city of Victoria and did a remarkable job, I was not much of a co pilot.
With that said having good support and a reason to live are instrumental in getting through this I was fortunate enough to have both.
By now I was having all kinds of problems my taste buds were gone my spit gland the same, I was not going a great job with nutrition, Boosts and Won ton soup. A threat of a feeding tube had me scared and at the suggestion of a doctor and a prescription I started using THC gummies to spur my appetite and suppress the nausea. I also started to use the anti nausea meds as prescribed. Being a 12 step program guy I felt all this went against my program however it was also a outside issue and one that would help save me from the dreaded feeding tube. A story of which a friends father had and ended up on for the rest of his life.
At one point with a visit to Doctor Smith I exclaimed I had not heard to many success stories and it was a concern to me, I mentioned a friends passing a year earlier from the same cancer and my friends dad on the feeding tube. She assured me she had a 85% success rate and however some symptoms like taste buds or spit my not return mg life had a good chance. At this point it seemed everything changed and I started to meet other going through or who had and faired well, more inspiration.
I had not seen my family in Alberta and assured them I was gona be o.k. Really I had no clue only faith. I had scheduled a trip to Alberta 2 weeks after treatment as the radiation keeps build for about that time I thought being tough I would manage to fly out, I dud not take into consideration long weekends and two missed days would put me back a week.
My friend Ted was aswell diagnosed with cancer at a similiar time and we would bump into each other often at the treatment center, this was a blessing and always came with a smile and some laughs. Originally Ted was considering turning down treatment for some YouTube options, I am glad he reconsidered, I was told to stay away from Dr Google and Dr YouTube, googling shit I don't know about will only take me to the worst case scenario and stress me out till I could see a doctor. The doctors at the cancer clinic work with it everyday and are trained to do the best job possible from scientific studies, Dr YouTube has a lot of unproven sounds good ideas that maybe worked on someones Grandma or was it a fluke and really who checks up on that YouTube shit for real time stats and proof?
Like I said be a good patient! If ya wanna try a home remedy try it after the proven technology has been done.
Getting to Alberta, the plane trip I felt half dead looked more dead and I'm sure scared everyone around I was also very concerned about my weakened immune system and being on z stuffy plane with who know what kind of germs once in Alberta the dry air and brewing radiation my back looked like a but of a rotted roast uncooked. And I felt nasty, I did not want my mom to see me like this and I wanted her to see I was I.proving before I left so the part in the book Anti cancer where it sayes stay active no matter what stuck in my mind so a week there I tried walking up the ski hill, made it about half way ran outa water which was crucial as I had no spit which even to this day can be a bother
This hike came as a great idea after the previous year my two sons and I had done a few hikes in Watertown so it was fitting and something I wanted to continue. A few days later my oldest son and I would make it to the summit, laughing at how many people would be on top of a mountain two weeks after radiation and 4 or 5 after chemo. I was still pretty sick but what a way to show improvement or was I just stubborn, this was also the start of a process that would change my shattered life and set me in a new direction. I was about to start to love life all over and about to find the symptoms of the spinal stenosis would have receded to pretty much just weakness, and weakness from the cancer treatment which took 65lbs of un needed weight of my skelator body.
Upon returning to my home on Vancouver Island I would recruit anyone who would walk with me friends or family, and if possible it would be to a summit or somewhere of elevation. Near daily or every second day I was out of the house and into nature. Early on at about the same time I started focusing on diet and learning about food and nutrition, I did not doctor google about the cancer but I did about diet. Changing what I thought was a healthy diet came easy, with a bit of research and talking with healthy active friends. Make no mistake I would never substitute western medicine for homeopathic or religious practices, however I may adapt some ideas to my self care program during and after. I am always suspicious of a snake oil salesman as well. That said I would never rule out a miracle but I would not bet my life on one happening either!
Hiking and health focused taking a bunch of time off work I proceeded along my taste buds would mostly return I still gave saliva problems but was learning to adapt, my 4 month check up came and it was a awesome boost. I believe its was Dr Ashwell who sat across from me and asked "Mr Goodwin you have lost the weight you gained in the first two months this is very concerning" I had only gained 7 or 8 lbs and it was gone, now remember I was active and eating extremely healthy, I went on to exclaim that was being very active, hiking and eating healthy. He sat back looked at me funny and said what are doing, "hiking and lots of it, I've been to the summit of 5 mountains and walk or hike every other day" I said. He sat back further smiled and said, "Really?" "Yes really" I said, and got the feeling of disbelief. He asked when did I start this and why, I told him the story of wanting to make sure my mom knew I was improving and the hike up the Pass Powderkeg, and that I had read staying active in the book Anti Cancer helped both radiation and chemo do its job as well as speed up recovery time. Again he sat back "wow that's amazing" he said, his expression was quite unusual so I asked " why is that?" "Because most of my patients are only getting out of bed by now" came his reply.
That visit truly inspired me to hike and walk even more, this was about to change as my hikes were getting longer and longer and I was feeling the need to do more, by this time a series of minor events from the previous year would lead me to my next decision, not able of them were A. I wanted a nice pair of Sandals and returning to my favorite hiking store in Blairmore I bought a pair of Lunas, not knowing their story. B. I was on my first every group hike again in the Pass when a young woman Kyla a group leader spoke of trail running, I was dumb enough to ask if she ran with hikers on or what? C. Back home on the island my farm friends told me another friend Lucas (aka firebelly) had taken up running after a head injury. You can guess where this pointed me.
I am not religious however very spiritual and after cleaning up I was learning to follow a spiritual path of my own, one of the things I was to learn was the path I would and will follow has many trail markers and signs I just have to watch for them. This helped me through the cancer treatments and my life since. The trail markers on my first trail run race couldn't keep me on course, but in life my faith and belief are my only compass.
That being said there was no turning back a few more check ups alot of enthusiasm running became my new thing and it's been amazing.
To anyone going through cancer please:
-be a good patient
-take a second set of ears to every appointment
-eat healthy stay active
-find something to believe in
-have a reason to live, there are many
-clean up, no cigarette drugs or booze, a clear head is important
- get a support group or join one
- clear up wreckage as best you can and de-stress your life
-pray and meditate
-stay active
-clean up your environment(home of toxic cleaners and such)
-the planet is still a beautiful place get out and enjoy it if you can
- read the book Anti Cancer
-love every moment
The running story is coming.
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